Mom, Dad, and Tom just dropped me off at the airport. They came in and talked with me for awhile, but I feel like in some way all of the important stuff has already been said and we’re not quite in the mood for talking about unimportant stuff. Except for Tom who, in his remarkably and enviably laidback way, was chatting about his new honey bee painting on the way to the airport. There’s something about the way things filter through his head that I don’t really understand. However, I feel like I can tell him just about anything. Mom was very quiet. Too quiet. When she’s happy and cheerful she usually talks a lot and laughs often. Dad was quiet except for occasional reminders and questions about the flight and the temporary housing. I had to even say good-bye to Piper Charbon when she was mewing. So it was a pretty emotional morning of “last’s”… not “last time” forever, but “last time” for some indeterminate amount of time. Last time I’ll see loved ones. Last time I’ll drive down Coconut. It’s bizarre the way everything has changed so quickly. I’m definitely ready to move and excited to move, but I think right now I just feel physically and emotionally drained and ready to acclimate to something instead of constantly adapting to change. What makes me feel worse is that I know Piper feels the same way. But Piper is getting loaded on a plane right now without her consent and without even knowing what’s going on. Poor thing.
The interesting thing, though, is that (despite all of the change and craziness of the past several weeks) I do feel a sense of peace related to the move. I believe it’s part of God’s plan. I don’t feel like Mike and I have really tried to push our will into some semblence of God’s will. We have really tried to pray about each step of the way and not get ourselves too “set” on any one thing. We wanted to do this a year ago when we thought Mike would be going to grad school. But then that didn’t feel to Mike like it was God’s will so we put it off.
So here I am. Sitting alone in an airport with an oversized carryon and a leather purse. Tamara and Mike are both texting me off and on, and that provides some sense of comfort. It’s almost as though I feel like I’ve now cut ties with Grand Rapids, the only place I really know, and I haven’t formed any new ties in Seattle yet, so I feel like I’m caught in some limbo where I don’t below anywhere. The link with Mike and Tamara is helping me feel like I belong somewhere.